Update: I'm getting married

Oh hey everyone! It's been so long since I've posted, and there have been so many things going on. I've just passed the year anniversary of being with my company. I'm so thankful to have a job that I enjoy, I'm good at, and that pays well.




Clara is growing and thriving! She's 2 1/2 years old, and you wouldn't believe how much she's talking. Maybe I'm just saying this because I'm her mother, but she is seriously the smartest kid I know. She's observant, well-mannered, and funny. She's running and playing. Climbing ladders and obstacles at the park and going down the slide a bajillion times. Her vocabulary has exploded. I love her more and more with each day that passes.
We gave up the pacifier about a month ago, and we're currently tackling potty training. She's such a joy and I couldn't be more proud to be her mama.



 In other news, I've met the love of my life! After Clara's Dad, I wasn't sure I would find someone. Kevin and I met in March through a mutual friend. We got to know each other better, and after dating for a while, I moved in with him. That was about 4 months ago. Things haven't been perfect, but that's how I know it's real. I laugh with him more than anyone. He's so sweet with Clara and loves her as his own. Clara loves him as well. If you ask her, he's HER Kev. :)  He's the sweetest, kindest, most patient man I know. Yes, we argue. But we get through it. We talk it out until its resolved.

 We've been through lots of ups and downs these past few months, and I can say with complete confidence that I'm going to spend my life loving this man. He gives me more than I ask for, and then some. I can see every time that he looks at me that I am loved.

About 3 weeks ago, Kevin proposed. It was the second best day of my life. :) The best part? I get the world's cutest step son, Jake. :) He and Clara get along so well. They're only 8 months apart in age and I wouldn't have it any other way.




Kevin and I will be eloping soon! Obviously, I'm not telling where or when, but I'm ecstatic to be his wife, and you'd better believe that I'll be writing a post about it when it's all said and done.

Hi. Hello.

I haven't posted since Janurary!? Say what!? That's ridiculous. Five months of ridiculous. I've missed the blog, but I've been so busy. Here's a recap of what's been going on lately...

I was working from home a day per week, and driving 120 miles a day the other four days. Finally, in March, I moved! I live in Grand Rapids, MI now, and I can say I prefer city living to the country life. I moved in with a co-worker. She has a three-year-old little girl, which has been great to Clara. They have grown to love (and fight) like sisters. The best part about this move, is now I'm only about 25 minutes away from work instead of an hour away. I have an in-home nanny now, which is awesome. And she is wonderful.
The worst part is that there are two (yes, two!) Target stores within 10 minutes of my house. It's kind of the best part, too. But my checkbook doesn't think so.

At the end of March, Clara turned TWO! And believe me, we've hit the sassy terrible twos. I don't like them. However, it is really cool to see Clara grow into her own personality. Her language development has grown in leaps and bounds. She loves playing at the park, being a "mama" to her "babies", water...playing in it, drinking it, walking through it... anything! She's extremely empathetic and caring. We've half-attempted potty training with no success... I just don't think she's completely ready yet. I moved Clara into a big-girl bed when she started climbing out of her crib. It made bedtime much more of a chore, so we switched back to the crib and she stayed put.

Work is going wonderfully. I've hit my stride this spring, and I feel very lucky to be doing so well. Working out has been going awesome as well. I've been faithfully sticking to a training schedule, and it's paying off. Slowly, mind you. But still worth it.
On June 22nd, I'm doing my first race in 3 years. I'm nervous, but looking forward to it at the same time.

It has been almost 7 months since Clara's dad and I ended things. And I've recently started to feel ready. For what? I'm not sure. But I will nervously admit that I have a guy now. Boyfriend? Significant other? Whatever terminology you want to use, please fill in. But he's great. Great for Clara, and wonderful for me. It's been a tough road. It's never easy to get over betrayal in a relationship, and move on without difficulty. I have trust issues. I have walls up. But he's slowly bringing them down. I'm starting to trust again. So we'll see how this goes. :) Stay tuned!

Making Changes

Well, the past year has been very trying for me. For my family. Lots of things have happened. Both good and bad. I'm making a true, full-hearted effort for 2013.

This is going to be a good year.

The week of January we've had thus far has been very trying. It's been a struggle to be the bigger person in situations where I want to be petty. To rise above the (excuse my french) shit that sometimes surrounds me, and to know that I'm better. I deserve more. And I'm not going to settle for any less.

I've never been a person to make resolutions. If I'm really motivated to do something, I do it. Regardless of whether  it's January 1st or July 15th. But seeing as this year is full of changes. I'm going to change. After all, if you do what you've always done, you'll get what you've always got. Therefore, it's time to do something different.

It's been no secret that I've been trying to lose weight since I was about 11. I've never been that girl. And I want to be her. I want to be the girl who's in shape. Who takes care of herself, and it shows. So here we go. I've lost 11 lbs since Christmas. Not a lot. Mostly, due to being sick. But I'm sick of starting over. And you can't start over if you don't quit. My plans have to be realistic. Clara is already in daycare 11 hours a day. And I refuse to sacrifice her waking hours for gym time. I'll be making life style changes. Walking/running every day. Without excuse. Even if I don't feel like a run, I have to walk. And walks normally turn into runs. So I'm fine with it.

I finished a cycle of P90X in October, and it's time I do another. So, every night after Clara goes to bed, it's P90X time. Every morning will be walk/run time. As the weather gets warmer, I can add in more outdoor activities.

I don't expect to be beach  ready this summer. But I'd like to be comfortable. I'd like to wear a tank top or short sleeves without feeling the need to wear a sweater. I'd like to wear shorts for the first time in 3 years. But maybe, just maybe, I'll be ready next summer.

This somehow turned into a "weight-loss" post. Which wasn't my intention. It stems from the new world that I'm about to experience as dating as a single mother. Clara's Dad and I have made our last attempt at making things work, and we've realized that it's not going to. (That's all I'm saying about that, so don't even ask.)

I'm not ready to get out there yet. My heart needs to heal. I need to figure out how to fit another person into my schedule. When Clara, and working 11 hours a day take priority, there's little time left over to meet anyone. Much less try to have a relationship. But I'm looking forward. I'm seeing the possibilities that exist. I'm considering. And I'm taking it slow. I'm getting used to the idea of having someone else in my life, in Clara's life, besides her Dad. And that's hard. I never pictured growing old with anyone but him. But I'm trying.

And I think that's the real theme for 2013. Trying. Trying for happy. Doing things differently then I ever have before. It will be hard. I will fail over and over. But I will learn. And I will be better for it.

Here we go. :-)